If you feel strongly that one thing should receive the bulk
of attention on your application, don’t write two of
your essays about it. Just write about it in two of your essays.
Yes, there is a difference. Sometimes, a good application
reads like a good novel. The main conflict isn’t ever
established and resolved in the same chapter. The reader thinks
he or she understands, but only in the end do they reach a
fulfilling resolution.
Here’s an example: In your freshman year, you were
a star football player who was destined to lead the team to
four straight championships. But, that winter, you were injured
in a car accident and not able to play anymore. Instead of
spiraling into a depression, you focused your energy on academics
and rose to the top of your class. That’s an awesome
story, but if you think about it, telling it more than once
could come off as immodest and may even be considered as “playing
the injury card.” So how do you present the idea in
more than one place without losing respect for the story?
First, as early on as you can, provide the basic story. Make
sure your reader is familiar with the struggle you went through,
but don’t get into small details or side stories about
the people who were involved. Next, simply use the now-established
story as a point of reference from which you can show growth,
modesty and personal reflection. In an essay about your relationship
with your favorite math teacher, mention how he told you the
story of when he broke his arm in the 10th grade and had to
quit baseball. Talk about how it put things in perspective
for you to see how this role model of yours had gone through
a similar ordeal and still become one of the most wonderful
people you knew. You don’t need to tell your whole story
again—just a word or two can make the connection tear-jerkingly
clear. Plus, your decision to focus on his story shows humility
and compassion. It also provides some insight on your attraction
to academics and shows that you’re truly inspired by
the opportunity to learn. Just like a novel, your opening
story was entertainment in itself, but the resolution you
show here in this later essay gives a sense of satisfaction
and pride to the reader. Aren’t you glad you didn’t
only mention it in one place?
